The Sanctity of Marriage--Matthew 5:27-32

In this next section, Jesus addresses the sanctity of marriage by addressing issues of adultery and divorce.  Much like today, Jesus' culture had gotten to the point where they essentially had "no-fault" divorces where the man could request a divorce from his wife for any reason by simply writing a letter stating his complaints and getting a certificate of divorce issued.  Sometimes the issue was as silly as that she burnt the toast.  Jesus makes it clear that this was never God's plan.

Marriage is to be a symbol here on earth of God's everlasting, unconditional covenant with His people (whether that be the nation of Israel or the Church).  When we tell each other that we last each other with an everlasting love and then break that vow, it causes others to doubt that God could love us with an everlasting love.  This is especially harmful to children whose only knowledge of a covenant relationship may be the relationship between their father and mother.

Returning to the text, Jesus says that marital unfaithfulness doesn't necessarily have to be physical, but could just as easily be emotional and mental.  "...I tell you that anyone who looks on a woman lustfully, has already committed adultery with her in his heart."  Again, Jesus internalizes the commandment and makes the people aware that sin first starts with a lust in the heart and that each of us are drawn away by our own evil desires.

Jesus then makes a bold statement.  "29 If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell."  Wow! How are we to interpret that?  Literally?  Should we really be going around gouging out our eyes and cutting off our hands?  I don't necessarily think so, but the message is clear that is something is causing you to sin or making you stumble and you have the choice to cut it out of your life, do so--this may be a relationship, a place of entertainment, maybe even a particular route that you drive home which makes you have to go past a particular place of temptation.  It is better for you handicap yourself in life by cutting off those things that are causing you to sin than to not lose these things and have them pull you away from God and possibly even to an eternity in hell separated from God.  I'm not saying that Jesus is saying you can lose your salvation, just that things like this might even keep you from wanting to be saved because you refuse to give up your sin and let Jesus be Lord of that area of your life.  Jesus is Lord of all--even our sex lives.

Returning to the issue of divorce, Jesus then says that the only permissible reason for divorce is sexual immorality, however, He does not say that someone must divorce for this reason.  We see in the book of Hosea that God compares His people to a sexually promiscuous woman who keeps being unfaithful to her husband even though He is faithful to her and keeps buying her back out of the sex slave market that she keeps getting herself into.  God had every right to say "I want a divorce" and makes this point known, but He also says that for the sake of His name and His reputation, He will not break his covenant with His people because then the nations would say that He never really loved them and was unable and unwilling to keep His covenant.  We must really think about this before we are so quick to get a divorce, because, as I said before, this affects how others (especially children) view God's covenant relationship with us--especially since one of the ways it is described throughout the Bible is a spousal or marital relationship.

Jesus also expressly forbids marrying a divorced person.  I won't add to this or attempt to explain it, but I don't think the meaning can be mistaken for anything else.  "31 “It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’ 32 But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery."  This is reiterated by Paul in I Corinthians 7, "10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife."--the passage continues to say that only in a situation where there is a marriage between an unbeliever and a believer (presumably one of them was saved after they were married) and the unbelieving spouse wants to leave, the believing spouse should let it happen.  There is no teaching from Paul or Jesus that ever says that a believer should initiate a divorce.

If you have committed sexual sin or been through a divorce, or even remarried, there is grace and forgiveness, but do not fall into the hyper-grace movement which says that you can continue to sin because God's grace will cover all your sins past, present and future.  Hebrews 10:26 says, "26 If we deliberately keep on sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for sins is left," and I John 3:6 says, "6 No one who lives in him keeps on sinning. No one who continues to sin has either seen him or known him." and verse 9 continues saying, "9 No one who is born of God will continue to sin, because God’s seed remains in them; they cannot go on sinning, because they have been born of God."  If we choose our sin over God, we have made our choice over which is master and Lord over us and we have never really made Jesus Savior and Lord.

For those that are in a position to still make peace and be reconciled, do whatever you can to do so.  If your unfaithful spouse does not want reconciliation (Paul assumes this would be because they are "unbelieving" when he talks about this in I Corinthians), then 

This is not a pleasant passage to cover and I know it sounds very legalistic, but it is part of the "identity" that Christ says His followers should have.  We should live in a way that is different and counter-cultural and brings glory and honor to God, and we should choose to obey His commandments because we love Him, even when it is inconvenient or possibly oppressive for us, and we must trust God to take care of us when our spouse doesn't always love us the way that God does.  We need to be careful to not add or take away anything from the Word of God, even if we are well-meaning.  I know many pastors that won't preach this passage because there are divorced or remmaried people in their congregation--shame on them.  I also know Christians that act like all divorced people and all adulterers are immediately irredeemable and on their way to hell because they misuse this passage...shame on them too.

I'll finish by posting this final passage from I Corinthians 6.  It speaks of the the old nature and the new nature as well as why sexual purity and integrity is of such importance. 
​1 Corinthians 6:9-20 New International Version (NIV)
9 Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men 10 nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
12 “I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but I will not be mastered by anything. 13 You say, “Food for the stomach and the stomach for food, and God will destroy them both.” The body, however, is not meant for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. 14 By his power God raised the Lord from the dead, and he will raise us also. 15 Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! 16 Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.” 17 But whoever is united with the Lord is one with him in spirit.
18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. 19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.